Hilarious Terrible Maps
Have you ever caught yourself looking at a map for longer than five minutes? No matter how many times we look at one, it’s still mind-blowing how far away Australia is from, well, everything.
Maps are freaking cool, and you can get super creative with them. Not only do they provide geographical measurements but also ways to learn about different populations. For instance, did you know that people in Ireland spend the most money on booze? How about the fact that pediatricians have the highest-paying job in Mississippi? Yeah, you can learn a lot from looking at a map.
While we love to learn, we also love to laugh. There’s a ton of room for imagination when it comes to creating a map so hilarious it’s terrible. Not sure what we mean? We stumbled upon Terrible Maps on Facebook, which publishes terrible maps that offer a pinch of humor, and then rounded up the best ones for your enjoyment.
Color Ado
If you take the “color” out of “Colorado,” does the state become black and white?!
Cheesy pun? Yes. Do we love it? Also yes.
Where the Coastal Snobs Live
FYI, if you’re in the red zone, you’re about 20 counties away from the coast of the United States. That’s an unusually terrible form of measurement, we know. But if you look realllyyyy closely at the shaded white that outlines the purple, it looks like a squirrel.
Just the facts, people.
Map of the United States If It Was an Oregon Donor
Admit it: You chuckled.
When a Band Announces a World Tour
When an artist announces a world tour, it’s like the U.S., Paris, London, maybe Berlin, possibly Tokyo or something. And ... that’s it. That’s the “world.”
Meanwhile, the rest of the population is like, "Hey! We exist and like your music, too!"
Center of Attention
Honestly, touché. This map takes us way back to elementary school. We’d stare at it on the wall while the teacher talked about America’s rise to being a superpower.
Did anyone else ever wonder why it looks like there’s an extra ocean?
To Go, Please
We see what you did there!
When You Can’t Afford Europe
Did you know that Ontario, Canada, has several cities that share the same names as some of the most popular ones in Europe?
All you need is a tank of gas and about five hours to spare, and you can hit up all of them in one day.
Outdiana
Do you know what else you can do this with? Miami and Yourami … how ’bout them apples?!
Alright, alright, stop looking at us like that.
Stay in the Green
The caption on this map reads: More people live in the green area than the blue area.
This takes "stating the obvious" to a whole new level!
Alone in the World Was a Little Catdog
We can’t unsee this! The real question: Is Tasmania really cat food, or is it a hairball?
CarAmel
Caramel derives from the Latin word cannamellis. Canna means “cane” and mel/mellis means “honey.” Then, the French adopted the word and pronounced it care-a-melle, and that’s how we say it in English.
Well … the people on the East Coast do, at least. The rest of the country just decided to drop an entire syllable.
North American Cryptids
Batsquatch? Skinwalker? Dover Demon? What kind of continent are we living on?!
There may not be compelling evidence for these North American cryptids, but we love to believe that Sasquatch roams the Pacific Northwest. You can’t deny the footprints!
The Most Efficient Route Between Every Springfield in the United States
Do you ever wonder in which state Springfield from “The Simpsons” is located? According to the show, we know it’s a place with a desert, swamp, beach and glacier.
We can narrow it down to the 33 Springfields in the U.S., but the show's creator says it's based on the one in Oregon.
Kossuth
Alright, who’s the psychopath making all of the Type A personalities cringe when looking at this map?
Don't you know we need order and structure?
Bad Neighbors
Next time you complain about your neighbors, think of this map. You could be in Belgium.
Oh, Canada!
Did you know that French is the native tongue of about 7.2 million Canadians, which is 20.6 percent of the population? Most of them live in Quebec, where French is the official and majority language.
The province even has a public organization to normalize the French language in work, communications, commerce and business within Canada. Ambitious, eh?
The Ultimate Pub Crawl
Fancy a pint? You don’t have to look too far in the United Kingdom. There are about 47,600 pubs, which is actually a 7,000-pub decrease from 10 years ago.
We guess they’re not drinking as much these days.
For All the Churches in Poland
For all the pubs in the U.K., it looks like there may be a church equivalent in Poland.
Poland has about 10,000 parishes and religious orders, but this map from Colaska.pl only shows 7,000 of them.
Trash
Here we go again. Saying “trash can” versus “garbage can” is a matter of where we live.
In the south, it's a "trash" can, while in the north, it's "garbage" can. At least we can all agree that the garbage goes in the trash and vice versa.
Sunshower
The word or phrase for rain that falls when the sun is shining apparently differs a lot for people. Around the world, the word usually has something to do with a wedding. For instance, it's called a wolf’s wedding in Morocco, a monkey’s wedding in France, a fox’s wedding in Japan or a jackal’s wedding in India.
But in the U.S., more often than not, people just don’t have a word to explain this phenomenon.
All Mixed Up
This just blew our minds!
Most-Used Word
Data shmata. Just pick whatever normalization lets you make fun of Florida.
Which Way's North?
Have you ever thought about using a compass in Antarctica? No? Same. But now we’re thinking about it, and we did a little digging.
Compasses are not useful in Antarctica because the magnetic South Pole is different from the geographical South Pole. Compass needles are designed to align with the Earth’s magnetic fields. When you’re in Antarctica, the compass is going to try to point down toward the magnetic South Pole, rather than point you north.
Map of Earth If There Was No Land
Right ... OK, this might be the most terrible map yet.
Yep, Australia's an Island
No, you can’t walk to Australia, but a British man who was on the run from Aussie police hired a Jetski to escape to Papua New Guinea, which is about 93 miles off the coast of Australia.
He made it to Saibai Island (still part of Australia) and was immediately arrested. Good effort, mate.
Who Runs the World?
Another map that highlights the reality of a musician's "world" tour, this one represents Beyonce's most recent world tour, which actually only took her to North America and Europe.
To be fair, though, she has technically done three other "world" tours that have taken her to other parts of the globe. Aussies on the far side of the globe are anxiously awaiting her return. She hasn’t performed on the continent since 2013.
Map of the U.S., According to the British
Don’t go to Alaska. That’s where the White Walkers are building an army to take over the world.
Map of the U.K., According to Americans
Wait, there are other cities in the U.K.?
Scotland, You Can Do Better!
Loch Lochy is a freshwater loch in Lochaber, Scotland. (Say that sentence five times fast.)
Legend has it that a supernatural being called a River Horse lives in the lake and likes to overturn boats. Yikes…
There Are More Kangaroos Within This Circle Than Outside of It
This fact isn't all that surprising, but did you know that there are more kangaroos than people in Australia?
The continent is home to 25 million people and an estimated 50 million kangaroos!
The Most Famous Brand From Each State
This map, called “The Corporate States of America,” was created by graphic designer Steve Lovelace. Each brand is either headquartered or founded in its paired state, and Lovelace admitted that the process of choosing the brand for each state was subjective. He explained that he, “Went with the company that I thought best represented the state, rather than the biggest or most notorious.”
So, that’s why you’ll see Apple for California rather than Google or Facebook.
Red, Blue and Yellow
Either something is wrong with the printer, or this is kind of, sort of accurate? Time broke down 196 nation flags by color and found that 14.3 percent of flags include red, and 17.7 percent include white.
It also found yellow in a nation’s flag shows up across five continents, which is why there’s a brown color in the center.
Coffee Fix
Apparently, America doesn’t run on Dunkin'. Just remember, the best coffee and the most popular coffee in each state are different.
But, there’s clearly a convenience to getting a Starbucks coffee when you’re running late for work.
Y'all, You Guys, Yous, Yinz
Saying “yinz” has turned into a brand in Pittsburgh. You’ll see it on T-shirts and souvenirs because, hey, they gotta make yinz remember your trip to the city.
But if you’re going to use it in conversation, don’t — you’ll just sound silly if you don’t have the thick Pittsburgh accent.
KFC
A KFC conspiracy theory, or would you say someone had way too much time on their hands?
Miley Cyprus?
OK, now this is just scary. But, we suppose that if Miley Cyrus were an island, Cyprus would be it...
Food Snobs
Italians know good food — so much so that they have quite the opinion about what's being served in other countries.
Fake pasta in China ... those are fighting words!
You Say Tomato, I Say...
Yes, there are potatoes in Spain.
But this map paints a very real picture about where these rhyming foods tend to be most popular.
Kangaroo Ownership Legality
Do you know that most states outlaw owning a kangaroo?
If you're interested in owning this trusty animal, then you'd better move to Wisconsin, West Virginia or South Carolina stat!
Did Someone Say Reese's?
Now, this is a map we can get behind.
No matter where you live in the U.S., candy is king!
Jesus Christ vs. The Beatles
Who knew? Apparently, there are more states (in red) where people search for The Beatles than Jesus Christ (according to Google searches from 2004 to present).
A Matter of Spelling
All spelling enthusiasts will love this one!
Johnny Cash Has Been Everywhere
In Johnny Cash's song, "I've Been Everywhere" (originally recorded by Lucky Starr in 1962), he literally lists all the places he's been.
He starts in Reno, Nevada, and then, well, this map shows you exactly where he goes.
Sharks vs. Humans
If the Discovery Channel's "Shark Week" makes you think sharks are the enemy, think again.
They're about 900,000 times more likely to be killed by humans than humans are by sharks.
Giraffe Patterns
Did you know that the patterns of giraffe fur can vary, depending on the region they live in?
Neither did we!
Countries Where Domino's Pizza Restaurants Exist
All the countries that have Domino's locations are indicated in this map in red.
The only question remains: What about Pizza Hut?
A Skewed World Map
Sure, this looks about right.
Countries With Fewer People Than...
"YouTube Rewind 2018" is the video on YouTube with the most dislikes — more than 17 million to be exact.
This map attempts to map all the countries that have a smaller population than this notorious video has dislikes. Of course, that number is always changing...
Czech Out This Map
With Brexit officially underway, this map highlights clever names for other countries that may want to leave the European Union.
Our favorite: Noatia!
U.S. Governors by Eye Color
Green eyes are very underrepresented in the States!
In Case You're Wondering How Many Countries Are North Korea
The real question here is why is Greenland marked as "no data"? What does this person know that we don't?
It Turns Out, Winter in the Northern Hemisphere Happens at the Same Time
Contrary to what people think, Florida is not in the Southern Hemisphere and, yes, it does get colder in winter.
Why Is the U.S. Like This?
A comprehensive map of every country that uses the month/date/year format. (Countries usually use year/month/date or date/month/year.)
The U.S. annoys the rest of the world with its weird date format, using feet instead of meters for height and holding on to Fahrenheit even though no one else understands it.
A Much-Needed Clarification
If only they were next to each other so we could've seen their real sizes before.
The World Map According to Sealife
To be fair, this really is their entire world.
The American Continent Looks Like a Duck
We'd like to start a formal petition to flip the conventional map of the world so this duck-shape is an everyday part of life.
If We Can't Have the Duck, We'll Take This Cat
Sorry, Australia!
Americans Were More Responsible in 1960
Then again, it's easy to be responsible when the technology hasn't been invented yet.
Did You Know the True Size of Egypt?
The caption for this was "Egypt is smaller than the United States, Russia and China combined."
Thanks for that rather obvious statement, but the true size of countries really is mind-blowing.
The Invasion We Should Actually Be Fearing
Why all states must fear Indiana is not clear, but if a map says it, it must be true.
We Always Appreciate a Grammar Pun
Though we can't let that misplaced apostrophe go.
Art Imitating Life
We finally know what inspired Michelangelo. (Yes, we know the political map of Africa didn't look like this when Michelangelo was alive, it's a joke.)
Who Is Coming Up With These Names?
We'd visit Rest and Be Thankful, but we're not too sure about Wetwang and Crapstone.
The U.S. Doesn't Do Much Better
There are some weird town names in the U.S. as well. What's up with Boring and Satan's Kingdom? Are the residents of these towns OK?
The Most Accurate Map of London You'll Ever See
London is divided into the very wealthy and the peasants. So it's basically still medieval Europe.
Go U.S.A!
That's right, the United States is the undefeated champion of every Super Bowl in history.
Incredible? Hardly. But a country that's been down on its luck for a while needs every win it can take.
(Culinary) Art
Both Argentina and (to a lesser extent) Chile are known for their beef and wine. So is it a coincidence that this fine piece of steak came out to be a geographically accurate map of these countries?
We think not.
To Be Fair, This Isn't Completely Inaccurate
Listen, Americans don't know much about the rest of the world, so how is the rest of the world supposed to know about America?
And let's be real. This is also how Americans think of their own country.
We're Sure They Had Their Reasons
Actually, they didn't. These totally real wars were complete disasters.
It turns out birds are kind of important for life. Who would've known?
The Map You Never Knew You Needed
If you ever want to explain to someone just how tiny Switzerland is, or how big Brazil is, show them this map.
We wonder who took the time to do this.
Why Does This Actually Make Sense?
Quick. Someone start the designer revolution.
Next Time, Just Get a Tattoo
It'll hurt less.
If By Weird You Mean Delicious, Sure
We don't care what people say, alligator tail is delicious. Lamb fries, peanut soup and sushirritos also sound amazing.
We can't defend garbage plate and hot beef sundaes, though. A line has to be drawn.
We'll Laugh So No One Figures Out We Suck at Math
We need a math person to tell us if this actually makes sense.
We're Insulted.
But we also can neither confirm nor deny that this is true.
Ancient Grease Produced Many Works of Art
It's wild how they were able to create realistic pieces with such limited tools.
We're Here for the Green and Yellow
Just skip the red parts and you'll be fine. The beaches and national parks will distract you.,
Oh, Yes, We've Been Here.
After a while, backpacking Europe can give you daily deja vu.
The Grid From a Horror Film
This is why strip malls should be outlawed immediately.
Poland Has Never Been One to Conform
Have fun with your boring language, sheeple.
This Is Shocking.
Jokes aside, English is actually not the official language of the U.S.
Seriously, look it up.
No Wonder People Don't Worry About Deforestation in the Amazon
Sorry, world, the Amazon is actually not this big. (Sadly.)
Only One of Them Is Correct
This will divide the country for centuries to come.
When Your Hiker Friend Invites You on a 'Walk'
Oh, sorry, we can't go. Our dog, erm, ate the neighbor's cousin's homework.
We'll definitely join next time.
Date Someone from Idaho
Apparently, they're not as self-centered. You don't want to end up with the Tinder Swindler or with the New York swindler, aka Anna Delvey.
What Do People Have Against Blood Sausage?
Now maggot cheese. Let's just say we're glad it's illegal.
Why Are You Messing With Our Heads?
Whoever did this is pure evil.
Italy Is a Culinary Mean Girl
We get the "aesthetically tasteless" category though.
Sometimes Solidarity Is a Bad Idea
Maybe let's keep this one symbolic rather than literal.
Oh, No
Now we know the real reason Elon Musk wants to go to Mars.
Florida Needs Some Therapy
Self-love is important, Florida. Even if you're an absolute hot mess.
World Map Centered on New Zealand
Nothing we say could top this Facebook comment:
"How refreshing to see the UK mumbling dementedly to itself at the edge of the world, rather than sat smack in the middle of its past colonial conquests, straddling the Greenwich Meridian like a bulldog on heat." — Stu McLellan
If U.S. States Had Their Own 'Brexit'
Personally, we love "Oregone" and "Bye-waii."
An Enlightening Map
In case you were wondering what the literal top states are.
This Circle Contains the Majority of the World Population
Talk about a mind-blowing map.
Also: Urban Vs. Rural Divide
City equals dark. Country equals light.
But in the end, a jean is a jean is a jean.
Pay Attention for the Next Time Someone Dedicates This Song to You
It's time to start holding people accountable for their promises.
You'll Never Believe No.1
Sorry, we just knew you'd fall for the clickbait.
We Bet It's the Same in the U.K.
As well as Australia and New Zealand.
Pff, those copycats.